Big Mama

As excited as I am to be going to VA, I feel a bit guilty. I’ll be missing my grandmother by just a few days. Had I re-arranged my trip, I could have seen her. I knew in advanced, and I really don’t to be there for anything special, so I could have come whenever. But I didn’t really want to. See, Big Mama has Alzheimer's. And it’s getting pretty bad. Last time I saw her, she thought I was still in school. High school that is. She kept saying how fat I had gotten. That was before I lost weight. And of course, that really makes someone self conscious about their weight, being told 20 times a day that they are fat. I know it’s not her fault and she doesn’t remember it at all, but at the time, I was SMALLER than her!!! She’s at my parents’ house now and she constantly ask where I am, if I have any kids, and am I married. I don’t think I can sit there and be asked if I’m married and why not 20 times in a row. Plus, what if I got there and she asked “Who’s that?” I just don’t think I can handle that. Does that make me a bad granddaughter?