A New Year, A New Me???
Almost everyone’s blogs that I read talk about new years and resolutions (even though some don’t call it resolutions!) Well, I don’t do resolutions. Never. I just know myself and I wouldn’t keep them. But I was hoping that at the beginning of this year I would be starting my life fresh and new. I wanted to have my house sold, be moved back to VA with my doggie, and be considering what I want to do with my life, if not already pursuing it. Instead, I find myself flailing around at work all day, coming home to an empty house that must be kept in “Showing Order” and still as confused as ever about my future. It’s getting frustrating… so frustrating. I have started to second guess myself. Is this the right thing to do? Do I really want to sell my house that I love? Do I really want to leave sunny south fla where I can be lying on the warm sand in 15 mins? What am I going to do with my life? What if I can’t do anything other than engineering? What if I’m making the biggest mistake in my life? Maybe this not being able to sell the house thing is a sign…
I’m really trying not to think like this, but as the days, weeks, months pass it just gets harder and harder. I’m just used to so much stability in my life. I have health insurance and a 401K. I go to the dentist every 6 months and bought a house at 25. Is this whole adventure really for me? I just keep telling myself that I’m not happy and I’ve got to make some drastic changes to make myself happy. Even if that means stepping outside of my comfort zone.
Everyone is very encouraging, though. One of my girlfriends is so excited for me. She even got me something very motivational for Christmas. She got me this book called What Should I do with my life ?.She also loaded me a book of hers called 6 Months Off. They are starting to re-motivate me. Plus Shel is encouraging me every day at work. I was looking online the other day because I was thinking I might want to work at a non-profit organization. I need to do something fulfilling for a change. Then I though, maybe I’d volunteer somewhere for a while. That will ease my soul. (Obviously, I could care less about money at this point!) I could join the peace corp. or something. Maybe I need to travel the world. Reading those two books will help me, I think. I just need to re-focus and start being more positive. Maybe a little trip to see my dog (At my parents house) will make me feel better.
7 Comments:
if you're not happy. that's not good. and if you're not happy because of what you are currently doing (work). that's not good. maybe the house not selling is a sign. or maybe, it's just not selling, cause it's just not selling. that you have the opportunity to go back and live with you parents is good. something to take advantage of.
i'm about in the same place now, too. thinking about changing my work situation, getting clearer on ideas. things making sense. i'm deciding to work to LIVE. not the other way around. and that means if i have to scale back (smaller apt/roomate), so that i can work less (part-time) and LIVE more, that's what i'm gonna do! tommorow's not garunteed.
Hey you sound like where I was at 4-5 months ago, and all I can tell you... from my experienc is:
"leap and the net will appear..."
PS Im a check that book out.
I can't imagine how trying these times must be for you. All I can do is support you. Why? Because I want it for you. I believe everyone should be happy or at least content with what they spend doing every day. After the storm there is always a calm. You will be so glad you made the change. You can find a beautiful house anywhere. How often did you go to the beach anyway?? Next time get a house with a pool! All I'm saying is DO NOT GIVE UP. There is so much more to life than answering to other peoples deadlines!
Perhaps you should travel. Doing things to make yourself happy sometimes put things into perspective for you. I wish you the best of luck in whatever it is you want to pursue :)
Whatever you decided to do in life, I know you will make the right decision.
I think you should focus less on what's currently making you unhappy and focus more on what your ideal of 'happy.' You should decide exactly what's missing in your life ex. love, family, money, career then make a plan to get where you want to be. If you're unhappy with job only, I'd say stay in current job until you have a clear idea of what direction you'd rather go.
oh and hey - i bought that book too - What should i do with my life. I'd only gotten half through it. I should pick it up and finish it. If definitely was helping me see some things clearer. That the 'epiphany' is not neccessarily i one time change your life, everything is perfect from here on out, moment.
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